Archive for 2006

The Police Athletic League Goes Recruiting

Police cruiser stops on 8th Ave by a group of black teens.

Loudspeaker: What are you doing there?
Black teens: [inaudible]Loudspeaker: OK, but no hands.

One teen takes three long strides and leaps on top of a mailbox, wobbles precariously, touches one finger on a wobble, and stands straight up.

Loudspeaker: Used your hands.

–34th & 8th

Wallace Shawn Has VERY High Standards

Guy #1: So I said, “Well, you all are, like, almost hot.”
Guy #2: Wait, why did you do that?
Guy #1: Oh, I wasn’t going to hook up with any of them. So then I said, “See, it’s like you all could be hot. Like she has a nice ass, you have a nice nose… I just wish I could put all of you together and create one big Frankenpussy.”

–Bleecker & Sullivan