Archive for 2006

They Both Missed Their Stop

Old lady: Are you getting off at this stop?
Guy: The train hasn’t stopped yet.
Old lady: I know, but I want to be ready when it does.
Guy: Don’t worry, you’ll be ready.
Old lady: Yeah, but you’re a lot bigger than I am.
Guy: I’m not going to block the door.
Old lady: Yeah, but I’m carrying a lot heavier bags than you are.
Guy: You should get a cart.
Old lady: You should get a donkey!
Guy: A donkey? I’ll consider it.

–N Train approaching Queensboro Bridge

Overheard by: Laughing N Train

The Scourge of Poetry

NYU chick #1: So in my class today we were talking about eunuchs — you know, like from the middle ages and shit — and whenever I hear ‘eunuch,’ I think of Munich, like the city.
NYU chick #2: Um… Maybe because it rhymes.
NYU chick #1: No shit it rhymes, but whenever people talk about China do you start to think about a vagina?
NYU chick #2: You’re weird.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: thank god i’m not in college anymore

The First 31 Years Were Just a Blip

Tourist #1: I want a soda, but I don’t see it on the menu.
Tourist #2: They don’t have soda here?
Tourist #3: I don’t see any drinks on the menu at all.
Tourist #1: This place’ll never make it without soda.

–Carnegie Deli, 54th & 7th

Overheard by: Sitting at the table next to them, three feet away