Archive for 2006

Get­ting Stroked (A NYC Short Sto­ry)

Hip­ster guy #1: Oh my god, fuck the Strokes! I’m here for Ea­gles of Death Met­al! Yeah! Ha, ha! Fuck, I love ea­gles but I hate death met­al!
Hip­ster girl: Where’s Ju­lian? Where’s Ju­lian?
Hip­ster guy #2: Shut the fuck up guys, this lead singer’s fuckin’ Dave Grohl or some shit!

–Ham­mer­stein Ball­room, West 34th Street

Girl: Was it wrong that I to­tal­ly did­n’t en­joy that at all?
Guy: Uh…
Girl: I mean it was like every song is ex­act­ly the same and they’re just a bunch of 6 1/2 foot tall guys in leather jack­ets.

–34th be­tween 8th & 9th

The Train Whis­per­er

Con­duc­tor: Be­cause of a wa­ter main break at 53rd Street, the last
stop on this train will be 42nd Street.
Guy: What the fuck?

Guy on loud­speak­er: Ladies and gen­tle­men and con­duc­tor, the last
stop on this train will be 57th Street. You copy that, con­duc­tor? You copy that?
Con­duc­tor: Uh, the last stop on this train will be 57th Street. This
train will be go­ing through 57th Street.

–N train