Archive for March, 2007

That’s Some Sandwich

Mom to five-year-old son eating sandwich at a wake: Put that sandwich down! Your grandfather is dead and you’re eating a sandwich!
Boy: [Spits out food and drops sandwich to floor] Is he alive now?


Overheard by: Culturally Confuzzled Human

Good Thing You’re Pretty

Little girl #1 looking at Manhattan Mini Storage poster: Do you know what ‘suburb’ means?
Little girl #2: Sunburns?
Little girl #1: Suburbs. ‘Stuck in the suburbs.’ They’re boring. See that guy in his underwear? His house is in the suburbs.
Little girl #2: Sunburns?

–N train

Overheard by: LSB

This Has Been Another Presentation of Alternate Histories

Man #1: Think about it, though — all great men have a great woman supporting them, giving them confidence, encouraging them. No matter what happens, they know she will be there when they get home at night.
Man #2: Yeah. Imagine if Coretta Scott King had been a nag and laid it on him when he got home at night — Dr. King, with all that shit he was dealing with, would’ve been like, ‘Hell no, I’m movin’ to Cali!‘
Man #1: For reals!

–R train

You Done with That Needle?

Study group girl #1: I totally had no idea that hepatitis had anything to do with your liver.
Study group girl #2: Oh, I know! I thought it was just a disease. You know, like AIDS.

–Hormann Library, Wagner College, Staten Island