Archive for 2007

At Least Nobody Felt the Need to Sing

B&T woman #1: Did you see Three Days of Rain?
B&T woman #2: No, what was it about?
B&T man #1: A stutterer fucks Julia Roberts.
B&T woman #1: Pay no attention to him — he’s a Neanderthal.
B&T man #2, leaning in and whispering: Does he really?

–Sardi’s Restaurant

Overheard by: Big Larry

Meet the Luckiest Girl in New York

Rich girl #1: So, let me get this straight — they weren’t even nice to you until after your brother died?!
Rich girl #2: It’s like they didn’t even know I was alive. My whole life was always, ‘Christopher this and that… Why can’t you be more like Christopher?’ Ugh, shut up!
Rich girl #1: That’s fucked up. Your parents are supposed to love everybody the same and now they’re trying to buy your love because they feel guilty. Seriously! They bought you a Cayenne and you didn’t even ask for it!
Rich girl #2: I guess it’s fucked up, but so what? My love happens to be for sale.

–Barneys

Overheard by: Sally