Archive for 2007

Wait, Where Ya Goin’? I Got Mints!

Drunk guy on cell: Yeah, man, all this stuff hap­pened… It was fucked up.
Blonde: Could you please keep it down a lit­tle?
Drunk guy on cell: Man, this blonde bitch in front of me wants me to shut up. Dumb bitch. [hangs up and ad­dress­es blonde] Sor­ry about that. So, where are you go­ing tonight?

–LIRR, be­tween Penn & Ja­maica

This Is Just Like the Time at That Fu­ner­al

Mid-30s male: I thought that we would see more chicks in this place…
Mid-50s male: Yeah! I mean, this is, like, a to­tal sausage-fest in here.
Mid-30s male: Look at that slut over there. You could see her fuck­ing nip­ples from a mile away.
Mid-50s male: I can’t see shit. Where’s my fuck­ing glass­es when I need them?

–Mo­MA

Over­heard by: Wow! Where are the women