Archive for 2007

If You Think This Is Fun­ny, You Are a Bad Per­son

Man #1: Hey, man, how’s your mom do­ing? I hear she’s kin­da sick.
Man #2: Yeah, she’s not do­ing so well. She lost her sec­ond leg.
Man #1: What? She lost an­oth­er one?
Man #2: Yeah, son. She called me the oth­er day be­cause she could­n’t find it. I went to her house and looked every­where for it, but noth­ing, son… Noth­ing. It’s fucked up, you know what I’m say­ing?
Man #1: Yeah, son. That’s some fucked up shit. Damn, son.

–At­lantic & 3rd Ave

Over­heard by: MS

Mine Was in Death of a Sales­man — What about You?

Queer #1: In sev­enth grade I was the uni­corn in the school play.
Queer #2: Oh my god! You were the uni­corn? What play? I was the uni­corn! Oh my god!
Queer #3: No fuck­ing way! I was the moth­er­fuck­ing uni­corn, too! This is fuck­ing crazy!
Queer #1: I know! I can’t be­lieve we were all fuck­ing uni­corns!

–Hol­ly­wood Din­er, 16th & 6th

If in Fact She Had One

Dude: So, I saw this girl yes­ter­day who had the most beau­ti­ful nose…
Chick: Re­al­ly?
Dude: Yeah, I’ve had dreams about this same nose since 1986. I nev­er thought it would hap­pen, but I’m so glad it did.
Chick: Wow. What did she look like?
Dude: I don’t know. I did­n’t get a good look at her face.

–G train, Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: Via