Archive for 2007

Rats: Granola? Get That Shit Outta Here!

Mom unwrapping granola bar for child: Now, eat this over my purse. I don’t want you getting crumbs everywhere.
Four-year-old: Why?
Mom: Rats like crumbs, and we do not want to contribute to the rat problem.
Four-year-old: Rats? I want to see the rats!
Mom: No! We won’t be a part of the problem.
Four-year-old: Where are the rats?!

–1 train

Overheard by: turtle

Smart Stays with You, Sweetie

Mother: You’re so pretty.
Four-year-old daughter, stomping: Don’t call me pretty! I need to be smart and pretty!
Mother: Okay, you’re smart.
Four-year-old daughter, crying: Nooo! Mom! Don’t just say ‘smart.’ Say ‘smart and pretty.’ It needs to be both! I can’t just be smart! Smart and pretty, together!

–Park Ave South

Overheard by: Lauren Joyce