Archive for 2007

Now’s Prob­a­bly Good

Prep #1: They made a list of the most im­por­tant peo­ple ever, and you know who they named num­ber one? Jo­hannes Guten­berg!
Prep #2: Who’s that, again?
Prep #1: The print­ing press guy! I mean, I know he’s im­por­tant, but he’s not that big of a deal.
Prep #2: Don’t they not even know when he was born?
Prep #1: Well, no. I mean, they know with­in a year or two.
Prep #2: If they can’t even fig­ure out when ex­act­ly you were born, you can’t be that im­por­tant.
Prep #1: Yeah, and you know who was num­ber two? Isaac New­ton! What did he re­al­ly do oth­er than give some­thing for my math teacher to talk about? My math teacher sweat­ed New­ton hard­core. It was all ‘New­ton, New­ton, New­ton.‘
Prep #2: You would think that if they were go­ing to rank the most im­por­tant peo­ple of all time, they would re­search it a lit­tle bet­ter and in­clude the re­al­ly im­por­tant peo­ple.
Prep #1: And if it’s of all time, would­n’t it make more sense for them to wait un­til right be­fore the end of time?

–Metro North train en­ter­ing Grand Cen­tral

Over­heard by: Court­ney Mess­er

It Was Laun­dry

Large, dread­locked home­less guy to man with over-stuffed back­pack: Yo, what you got in that big-ass bag?
Back­pack guy: Noth­ing good.
Large, dread­locked home­less guy: Got any mar­i­jua­na? [As back­pack guy nears] Damn, white­boy! You kin­da big… I ain’t gonna fuck with you!

–Near sub­way en­trance, NW Union Square

Over­heard by: matt