Archive for 2007

Now’s Probably Good

Prep #1: They made a list of the most important people ever, and you know who they named number one? Johannes Gutenberg!
Prep #2: Who’s that, again?
Prep #1: The printing press guy! I mean, I know he’s important, but he’s not that big of a deal.
Prep #2: Don’t they not even know when he was born?
Prep #1: Well, no. I mean, they know within a year or two.
Prep #2: If they can’t even figure out when exactly you were born, you can’t be that important.
Prep #1: Yeah, and you know who was number two? Isaac Newton! What did he really do other than give something for my math teacher to talk about? My math teacher sweated Newton hardcore. It was all ‘Newton, Newton, Newton.’
Prep #2: You would think that if they were going to rank the most important people of all time, they would research it a little better and include the really important people.
Prep #1: And if it’s of all time, wouldn’t it make more sense for them to wait until right before the end of time?

–Metro North train entering Grand Central

Overheard by: Courtney Messer

It Was Laundry

Large, dreadlocked homeless guy to man with over-stuffed backpack: Yo, what you got in that big-ass bag?
Backpack guy: Nothing good.
Large, dreadlocked homeless guy: Got any marijuana? [As backpack guy nears] Damn, whiteboy! You kinda big… I ain’t gonna fuck with you!

–Near subway entrance, NW Union Square

Overheard by: matt