Archive for 2008

Chase Is an Equal-Opportunity Forecloser

African American bank employee: Ma’am, it’s not Chase’s fault that you had to go to a Citibank at 4 am because there was a homeless man sleeping in the Chase lobby. We cannot refund the $1.50 fee that Citibank charged you.
90-year-old woman: He was Caucasian! Can you believe it?
African American bank employee: Ma’am, even Caucasians can be homeless.

–Chase Bank

Then We’ll Dip Into the Sacrificial Wine and Have a Good Laugh

Woman #1: She keeps acting all funny now, and I’m up to the point where I’ll have to beat her ass.
Woman #2: You crazy.
Woman #1: I’m beating her ass right in church, you watch me!
Woman #2 (laughing): You crazy!
Woman #1: I’ll say “Lord, forgive me,” before I beat her ass down right in front of the altar!

–PATH Train

Overheard by: Manhattman