Archive for 2008

They’ll Have Their Own Reality Series within a Week

Girl #1: Okay, let’s go around the table and tell horrible hook-up stories.
Girl #2: Can anything top the time I woke up stark-naked in London after a night partying in New York?
Girl #3: No one can top that. Unless you consider the time I stole a guy’s car in the middle of the night so I wouldn’t have to do the walk of shame.
Girl #4: Don’t forget the part where you wrecked it and went to jail…

–Spice Market, 13th & 9th

Overheard by: Jess

I’d Blow Up a Bridge, Too, after Listening to Yorke’s Solo Album

Black teen girl to friends refusing to get on train: Why you gotta be so stupid? Get on the damn train!
Black teen guy: They gonna just stand there like that? Let the train go!
Black teen girl: Bitch said she thought that guy’s gonna blow up the train [points to gloomy white kid in RadioHead shirt].
Black teen guy: What?! Why you gotta say that when we goin’ over the bridge?!

–Brooklyn-bound J train

Overheard by: cp

Getting Cooler

Teen: Oh my god! You’re sooo cool.
12-year-old ghetto kid, throwing snappers at him: Fuck you, cracka!

–President St, Park Slope

Overheard by: Lucian

On Her Back

Girl #1: She’s really hairy, like no one else.
Girl #2: Yeah, I know what you mean — in a cute way.
Girl #1: She does the bows and barrettes all the time…

–M34 Crosstown bus

And Stop Fondling Yourself

PA announcement: Passengers with over-sized packages must check them at the end of the jetway.
Traveling dude #1: I have an over-sized package… But I can’t check it, baby! Woo-hoo!
Traveling dude #2: You’re a jackass.

–LaGuardia

Overheard by: octoserge