Archive for 2008

The In­vis­i­ble Hand Be­hind Sub­way “Ac­ci­dents”

Wall Street guy #1: So I was watch­ing A Shot at Love with Tila Tequi­la and my son asked: “Dad, what’s a les­bian?” I mean, I wish I could tell him about it when he’s ready.
Wall Street guy #2: Yeah, so any­way. They have these on­ly boys and on­ly girls birth­day par­ties for the lit­tle kids down at Fire Is­land…
Wall Street guy #1: So you think the par­ties turn them in­to les­bians?
Wall Street guy #2: No, I’m just try­ing to segue in­to talk­ing about some­thing oth­er than… (looks around train sus­pi­cious­ly) les­bians.

–Down­town 6 Train

Your Neck Gets Stiff Keep­ing Your Nose in the Air

La­dy: Yeah, I mean I’m look­ing for some­thing that is a fit for me. Ya know, you’re ei­ther an East Side girl or a West Side girl… there’s re­al­ly no in-be­tween.
Re­al es­tate agent: Right, right, I un­der­stand. That’s why I’m here.
La­dy: Be­cause you know, I don’t want to be sur­round­ed by frat bros and their yo­ga moms.
Re­al es­tate: Un­der­stand­able, I would­n’t sub­ject any­one to that.

–Star­bucks, 57th & Lex­ing­ton

Over­heard by: try­ing to get caf­feine fix

Damn the Fire Swamp and Its Quick­sand!

An­i­mat­ed queer: I knew Rachel was go­ing to fall in­to the trap! I just knew it. I said to my­self: “She’s go­ing to fall in­to the trap!” and then she showed up, and I told her, “Rachel. Girl, don’t fall in­to the trap!” and what did she do?
Fe­male com­pan­ion: She fell in­to the trap!

–Church St & Vesey

Over­heard by: Man­hattman