Guy #1: And I don't want to be gay about it, but it was love at first sight.
Guy #2: Dude, that's pretty gay.
Guy #1: Yeah, it is rather gay.
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Heather
Archive for 2009
Wanna Split It?
Preppy girl #1: I'm feeling sorta…
Preppy girl #2: Peckish?
Preppy girl #1: Like starvation-ish.
Preppy girl #2: Uh, I've got a mint.
–Liquor Store, Prospect Heights
Overheard by: lola w.
…Wrapped in Bacon.
20-something chick: What's a good man gift?
20-something friend: Full frontal nudity.
–Rockefeller Plaza
Or Suffocated in Their Polyester Jumpers
Girl, drawing: Should her shoes be open-toed or close-toed?
Boy: Close-toed. Like ballet shoes.
Girl, seriously: You mean platform ballet shoes?
Boy: There's no such thing as platform ballet shoes. You can't do ballet in platforms. This is why disco died, Anne. Everybody fell over.
–Midtown
Overheard by: Sunny
Psh, Like Wendy's Is Kosher
Cashier: What would you like to order?
Tween: A cheeseburger.
Cashier: Do you want cheese on that cheeseburger?
–Wendy's
Overheard by: Chelsea
Only on Fridays
Bimbette #1, walking by long line waiting outside Grimaldi's: Look at this, all these people in line for pizza.
Bimbette #2: Wow, what are they doing? Are they putting crack in it?
–Old Fulton St., Brooklyn
Overheard by: Ger-Man in New York
…Are You As Turned on As I Am?
Guy to girl smoking cigarette: Didn't your mother tell you smoking is bad for you?
Girl: Didn't your mother tell you never to talk to strangers?
–181st & Broadway
Though My Hindsight Is 20/20
Preteen girl #1, seeing friend take out glasses case: Oh my god, you wear glasses?
Preteen girl #2: Yeah, I have really bad foresight.
–Columbus Cricle
Which Is My Default Answer for All Issues Involving Men
50-something woman to coworker at Burger King: And he said, “Why you always coming in here, dressed up like you're at the beach? What is that?” And I was like, “Yeah, please, put me on a real beach, in like Dominican Republic or something.”
Coworker: He probably just wanted to see you in your bikini.
–LaGuardia Airport
Overheard by: … But I know I wouldn't
We're Not Even Tourists
Girl #1: That's a tourist bus!
Girl #2: Yeah, well… we're tourists!
Girl #1, after long sigh: We're from Long Island!
–E 14 St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: holly