Archive for 2009

Hobo: Stupid Dogs Steal All the Glory

Man: That’s why I make you guys take your shoes off when we get into the house. When I was a kid, people would make their dogs poop on the street, so you had to watch where you step when crossing the street. Now it’s just everywhere, all over the sidewalks.
Kid: Ew!
Man: They outta call this “Park Poop” instead of Park Slope.
Kid: Poop Slope!
Man: Haha, yeah, Poop Slope! Whoa, did you see that? That was a big one, like from a Great Dane or something!

–Park Slope, Brooklyn

Overheard by: elaisted

Which Was Saddam’s First Mistake

Columbia girl, looking at cell phone: Oh shit, I have like five missed calls from State Department! Should I call them back? Is it too late now?
Columbia guy, bewildered: What? The State Department?
(girl’s cell phone rings)
Columbia girl: Hi, daddy. Well, I realize that, but I just got them. Well, do you think it’s too late to call back now? Okay, I’ll call them ASAP.
Columbia guy: What did your dad say?
Columbia girl: He told me that when the State Department calls, you should probably answer.

–Le Monde, Morningside Heights

Overheard by: bored prof

Don’t Worry, There’ll Be a New Evil Empire Before You Know It

Coworker #1: When I studied abroad in Germany I was…
Coworker #2 (interrupting): Oh, did you see the Great Wall?
Coworker #1: In China?
Coworker #2: No. (laughs) The one in Germany. Don’t they have one in Germany?
Coworker #1: The Berlin wall? That’s not there anymore.
Coworker #2: Oh. What a shame.

–Office, Midtown

Overheard by: get me out of finance