Archive for 2009

Ac­cord­ing to the Za­gat Guide for Big­ots

Asian NYU fresh­man: I still can’t get over how many gay cou­ples there are here! Es­pe­cial­ly when you see the black ones.
Naive friend: Re­al­ly? That must be so weird.
Asian NYU fresh­man: Yeah, it is! I’m like, “Black peo­ple are sup­posed to be all ghet­to, and cool!”

–Union Square

Over­heard by: Re­al­ly??

Nor­mal for an Amer­i­can, or What?

20-some­thing skin­ny hip­ster girl: I’m in an eat­ing phase. It start­ed on Tues­day, and it’ll go un­til Fri­day, if I’ve cal­cu­lat­ed my lu­nar cy­cle cor­rect­ly.
20-some­thing skin­ny hip­ster boy: Yeah, me too… I had­n’t eat­en for weeks, so I’ll prob­a­bly go til Sat­ur­day or Sun­day.
20-some­thing skin­ny hip­ster girl: What about you?
20-some­thing chub­by stoned hip­ster girl: I don’t know what the fuck you guys are talk­ing about. I eat like a nor­mal per­son.

–Up­per East Side

Over­heard by: emi­ly dar­win

You There in the Back Row — This Means You.

Stu­dent, re­fer­ring to pi­nus: Wait, does that ac­tu­al­ly mean “pe­nis”?
Latin teacher: No. But once I made a joke about penis­es in a pa­per in col­lege and my teacher wrote, “nev­er do this”.
(class laughs)
Latin teacher: So guys, don’t play with your penis­es!

–Bard High School Ear­ly Col­lege

Over­heard by: The­seus