Archive for 2009

Don't Ask Me to Do the Cultural Math

Hipster guy: Be right back. (ten minutes later, comes back and sits down) Nevermind.
Hipster girl: You can't “nevermind” a “be right back” ten minutes into said “be right back” time. It then goes from being a “nevermind” to a “back.”
Hipster guy: I was only gone a second…
Hipster girl: It was still a valid time to say “back.” Not “nevermind”.

–Starbucks

Overheard by: Rad Rayna

What Happens When You Use the TV As a Babysitter: A Simulation

Skinny girl: I'm sorry you have to go through this.
Sobbing girl: I just…I just hope he's going to… be okay.
Skinny girl: Do you think that maybe you want to go and compose yourself in the office?
Sobbing girl: I was just… there. And I would… but the candy… sucks.
Skinny girl: I'll… I'll give you my last Mentos.
Sobbing girl: The Freshmaker?

–The Met

Now If Only Katie Holmes Would Have That Experience

Girl #1: Dude, how amazing was Adam Lambert in concert last night?
Girl #2: Holy shit! There was a point in the show where I actually considered going on Zoloft because I have absolutely no shot with him, but then he gyrated again and threw me out of my heterosexual-girl-in-love-with-a-hot-flamboyant-gay-man funk.

–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle