NASA’s Planning a Voyage

Kid looking at book: It looks like an alien world or something!
Mom: That’s Seattle.
Dad: Well, it’s on the west coast. It is alien.

–5^th Ave, Brooklyn

Overheard by: super des

The Latex Catsuit and Whip Are Pretty Hot, Though.

Man to woman: What about your coworker?
Woman: Oh yeah! She was both nice and hostile.

–E Train

Or Gay.

Indian guy: So what’s going to happen at the Lunar New Year performance?
Asian guy: I dunno, ask someone Asian.

–115^th St & Broadway

Overheard by: darkhorse5

What Happens When You Hang Around with a Bunch Of Meatheads

Guy #1: Hey, where do lamb chops come from? What animal?
Guy #2: (shrugs shoulders)
Guy #1: I think they come from a pig, like pork chops, but a different part of the animal.
Guy #2: Sounds about right.
Guy #3: Are you fucking kidding me?

–96^th St & West End Ave

Stupid First Amendment

Girl #1: Is he reading the Bible?
Girl #2: No, it’s something about Nazis, can’t you see the swastika?

–Q36 Bus

…Up Your Shirt.

Little boy to little girl: I like you.
Little girl: What?
Little boy: I said “I like looking for rocks.”

–Low Plaza, Columbia University

Your Editors Would Prefer Never to Hear About Gummi Bear Again.

Dude to friend: You know what I mean, right?
Friend: Yeah, you mean he’s rich, right?
Dude: Yeah, he’s rich, but he’s not independently wealthy. I mean, if he didn’t have all that money, he wouldn’t be rich.

–88^th St & Columbus Ave

Overheard by: P. Marino

I Bought This Jaunty Monocle for Just Such an Occasion

Punk kid, noticing sirens and flashing lights in the distance: I wanna go down there!
Friend: I don’t care.
Punk kid: But I wanna be on Eyewitness News!

–57^th b/w 3^rd & 2^nd

Overheard by: tori

Guess You Have to See the Movie to Understand This

Thug #1 to thug #2, during showing of The Mist: Man, I would’ve just stayed inside the fuckin’ supermarket.
Thug #2: Yeah.
Thug #1: I’d be eatin’ all those Doritos an’ shit.

–11^th St & 3^rd Ave

Overheard by: Jojo

Any Weirder Than Eating the Body Of Christ? Weigh In, Readers!

High school girl to raucous group of friends: Oh man, remember the time we dared him to lick the church?
Group of friends: (wild laughter)

–Outside Grace Church, Broadway & 10^th St