Archive for July, 2010

Does­n’t It Go Against the Na­ture Of an An­i­mal to Keep It Teth­ered?

Dude to hip­pie chick walk­ing cat on leash: Yo, that’s a fun­ny look­ing dog you got there.
Hip­pie chick walk­ing cat: That’s ’cause he’s a cat.
Dude: Why you walkin’ a cat down the street in New York City?
Hip­pie chick walk­ing cat: Cause back in Col­orado, he was in­door-out­door, and now that we’ve moved out here for a while I just can’t keep him in­side. But I can’t let him roam free on the streets, so I take him for walks. I love him too much to keep cooped up. It, like, goes against the na­ture of an an­i­mal to keep him in­side and not let him ex­pe­ri­ence the world out­side and not let him meet oth­er an­i­mals and oth­er peo­ple.
Dude, amazed: Mar­ry me.

–12th St & 2nd Ave

Over­heard by: Yeah, I like weird chicks too

And You Look Cute, If I May Say So

Woman #1: Ohmigod.
Woman #2: What?
Woman #1: Ohmigod!
Woman #2: What? What?!
Woman #1: Why am I naked on twit­ter??!
Woman #2: You can be naked on that thing? Sign me up!
Woman #1: I’m gonna kill that prick!
Woman #2: (laughs)
Woman #1: What’s so fun­ny?!
Woman #2: They should call it “twat­ter.“
Woman #1: Shut up.
Woman #2: Tweets from your twat.
Woman #1: So you’re not gonna take this se­ri­ous­ly?
Woman #2: … Fod­der from twat­ter.

–Dunkin’ Donuts