Archive for August, 2010

The Kind Of Thing We’ve Come to Ex­pect from Blondie.

Blonde in con­vert­ible: Hey, cutie!
Suit: (turns around briefly, keeps walk­ing)
Blonde: Hey! With the nice ass, we were talk­ing to you!
Suit, walk­ing back to con­vert­ible: Yes?
Blonde: My friend here thinks you’re cute and wants your num­ber.
Suit: Uh… I’m flat­tered, but I have a fi­ancee, so I’ll pass.
Brunette dri­ver: I did­n’t ask if you were sin­gle, I said you had a nice ass and I want your num­ber.
Suit: Again, thanks, but no.
Brunette: How about I give you mine?
Blonde: You know, for when the mar­riage does­n’t work out.
Suit: Yeah, no. But you girls have a great day.

–3rd Ave & 46th St

Tonight’s Movie: The Pur­suit Of Hap­pymeal

Mc­Don­ald’s cashier: Next!
Teenage girl: Yeah, I’d like a chick­en nugget Hap­py Meal, girl toy, but can you put it in a nor­mal bag?
Mc­Don­ald’s cashier: A bag?
Teenage girl: Yeah, in­stead of the Hap­py Meal box.
Mc­Don­ald’s cashier, per­plexed: But it’s a Hap­py Meal…
Teenage girl: This is­n’t a dif­fi­cult con­cept. A Hap­py Meal. Chick­en nuggets. Girl toy. In the bag the oth­er food comes in.
Mc­Don­ald’s cashier, per­plexed: But it’s a Hap­py Meal. They come in a box.
Teenage girl: Okay, can you give me an ex­tra bag, then?
Mc­Don­ald’s cashier, per­plexed: Okay!