Archive for 2010

Frankly, I On­ly Talk to You Be­cause You Pay Me

Woman in ther­a­py: So I don’t know, I re­al­ly liked her.
Ther­a­pist: Well, did you talk to her about it?
Woman: No, the bitch does­n’t call me any­more, she does yo­ga now. We used to go to Star Trek con­ven­tions to­geth­er, but she stopped talk­ing to me. I don’t even care about that bitch any­more.
Ther­a­pist: You know, she’s not a bitch just be­cause she does­n’t want to talk to you!
Woman: Yes she is, I don’t even care.

–For­est Hills

Over­heard by: They need a sound ma­chine

Um, Hel­lo, I Tan Reg­u­lar­ly!

Rich girl: So yeah, we just got back from the club.
Black guy: Oh, yeah?
Rich girl’s friend: Um, ex­cuse me…
Black guy: Ex­cuse me! I’m talk­ing to her, not you. You’re the ug­ly one, re­mem­ber?
(phone rings) Yo. Hey, man. Oh, noth­in’. Just talk­ing to a cou­ple white hos.
Rich girl’s friend: What?
Rich girl: Stop bein’ such an ug­ly white ho, Danielle.

–LIRR

Over­heard by: Just an­oth­er white ho.

The Hat’s an SS-om­brero

Loud bald man: My grand­moth­er taught me that it’s rude to keep your hat on while you’re eat­ing! Take it off, Robin Hood!
Guy in hat: (mum­bles)
Loud bald man: Come on, take it off. We’re not in fuckin’ Mex­i­co.
Loud blonde woman: Is­n’t it so great that he’s Mex­i­can-Ger­man? His par­ents are so great.
Guy in hat: (mum­bles again)

–Le Zie, 7th Ave

Over­heard by: Rose Fox