Overheard In New York

Archive for January, 2011

Wednes­day One-Lin­er Ch­eney

Guy to friends: She walks like she has a huge dick, that’s how she walks!

–Of­fice Build­ing, 34th St & 3rd Ave

Over­heard by: Space­dog ears

Drunk guy: So I put my dick in the hard dri­ve.

–10th St & Ave A

Over­heard by: guy walk­ing dow street fri­day

Girl on cell: I can’t com­pete with his dick!

–L Train

Over­heard by: fuhgged­abou­dit

An­gry hot girl to friend: Even if he’s the biggest swing­ing dick in the world, so what?

–10th St & 5th Ave

Over­heard by: jen­nifer to­bias

An­gry mid­dle-aged woman to silent hus­band: I come home, I want some gin and some dick.

–59th St & Lex­ing­ton Ave

Over­heard by: Dave

Wednes­day One-Lin­ers: Glug Glug Glug, Ahh!

NYU stu­dent to an­oth­er: I haven’t been drink­ing as much since I turned 21.

–Du­ane Reade

Over­heard by: Ro­ge­lio

Col­lege girl to friend: I was­n’t drunk, I was just cheer­ful.

–Canal St & Mott St

20-some­thing girl on cell: He was drunk and fuck­ing his de­mon ex-girl­friend.

–181 & Ft. Wash­ing­ton

Guy in dirty army clothes to an­oth­er: I was still drunk, thank god Dunkin’ Donuts was open.

–D Train

Mid­dle aged guy on cell: That’s what hap­pens when you drink, moth­er­fuck­er! You can’t re­mem­ber shit!

–Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: Aron

There Are Niche Fetishists Who Would Pay Top Dol­lar for That Footage

Guy #1: I just don’t like the look of the out­ie. And some­times she rubs it against me, it creeps me out!
Guy #2: Dude, she’s fuckin’ hot! And you’re com­plain­ing when she rubs against you?
Guy #1: No, no, no–she’s not rub­bing against me, she’s rub­bing the out­ie against me–big dif­fer­ence! And she’s on­ly do­ing it to creep me out, ’cause she thinks it’s fun­ny.

–6 Train