Archive for 2011

…I Feel a Disturbance in the Force

Guy, in Star Wars’ Emperor voice: Oh, I do believe the weapons on this battle station are fully operational.
Girl: That means you have an erection, doesn’t it?

–Atlantic Center, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Jesus Jon

Hey, Being Fat Is My Performance Art!

Fat hobo to skinny homeless artist: Can you spare some change so I can get something to eat?
Skinny homeless artist: Are you fucking kidding me?

–33rd St & Park Ave

The Terrorists Did Win

Guy to lady: So, there are snipers on your roof?
Lady to guy: Sigh… yeah.

–45th & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Seth

Brooklyn’s Notorious for Arguments About the Space-Time Continuum

Church-goer #1, from across the street: Hey! I been lookin for you!
Church-goer #2, looking puzzled: You been lookin for me? What’s the matta with yo eyes? You blind? I’m right here walking towards you now! You ain’t see me?

–Marcy Ave & Fulton, Brooklyn

Overheard by: rick

That’s One Of Our Songs!

Hobo, approaching musicians: Hey, guys, what are you up to tonight?
Band member: We just played a show here.
Hobo, walking away mumbling: I ain’t gonna get no pay from damn musicians…

–Outside Cakeshop, Ludlow

Overheard by: THA

So Old, It Says “Made in USA”

Woman #1: Well, when we were at that thrift store…
Woman #2: Not thrift! Vintage! It used to be thrift; now it’s vintage! But it’s still old, bitch! It’s old!

–Williamsburg

Overheard by: Brian L.