Archive for October, 2014

Wednes­day One-lin­ers Know the Facts of Life

Lit­tle girl: Keep your legs closed and your books open. My mom­my says a girl can get a boyfriend and then she has to drop out of school.

–up­town A train

Woman: I ain’t gonna take that shit, a’ight! I’m gonna fuck that nig­ga ’til a nig­ga come out­ta me, a’ight!

–38th be­tween 5th & 6th

Over­heard by: Not That Nig­ga

Pre­sent­ing the New Catch­phras­es for 2006

Guy #1: Yes­ter­day this girl said she want­ed to throw her­self in front of the train and I’m like, “This bitch is crazy.”
Guy #2: Re­al­ly?
Guy #1: I mean, I see that moth­er­fuc­ka com­ing and that shit ain’t gonna hap­pen, you know?
Guy #2: Maybe she was de­pressed.
Guy #1: Are you kid­ding? That shit is pan­cake style…bitch is crazy.

–Penn Sta­tion

Over­heard by: Nan­der

The Gos­sip Girl Scene That Nev­er Made It to Air

Teen boy #1: I don’t like any of her fam­i­ly ex­cept her mom. She’s okay.
Teen boy #2: Her mom is crazy, yo. I want to rape her with this um­brel­la. I bet you if I fucked her, she would­n’t even re­mem­ber, she’s so crazy. Would­n’t it be cool if there were a hot chick, like 21, with Alzheimer’s and you fucked the shit out of her and then the next day she could­n’t re­mem­ber?

–Q44 Bus

Over­heard by: Col­le­giate Cutie