Archive for 2014

The Virtue of Selfishness

Pastry Shop Worker: Is anyone willing to give up their seat for a girl that has to stand on her feet all day?
Train Riders: [SILENCE] Pastry Shop Worker: Come on, all you guys just go sit in front of your computers every day, how damn hard is that? I have to make shit for people and stand on my feet all day. You people are so selfish! 

–6 Train

A cheap Jew? No…

Middle-aged man, into his cell phone: It’s an oneg-shabbat. It’s just a big dinner where everyone can meet each other and talk. It’s only a few hundred dollars for you to sponsor it. [pause] Well, it’s really not a dinner. It’s just some fruit and plates for people to pick at.

– Midtown

I have that record

Hipster: Hey, that’s my favorite song! It’s by Philip Glass!

– Alt.coffee, after employee stopped a CD playing in the background that had skipped and repeated the same sound for a few minutes.