Kid to friend: My grandpa and his twin brother get these crazy deals at this discount veterans’ liquor store in Ohio. It’s pretty much the happiest and saddest place on earth at the same time.
–Huckleberry Bar, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Shannon
Girl on cell: I had the worst diarrhea yesterday from drinking bourbon all night. (pause) I know, it gives me the bum-wees too!
Overheard by: What-the?!
Wandering elderly man, loudly to himself: Let’s have a shot of whiskey and get this relationship ova with!
–W 62 & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Assistant To The Locksmythe
Mother, very nonchalantly, to child: Let’s go get mommy a beer.
–Prospect Park Bandshell, The Swell Season Concert
Overheard by: Mat the Oz