Archive for 2015

Wednesday One-Liners for Young, Urban Professionals

Female yuppie: As a general rule of thumb, I think I should refrain from going to the Hustler Club with my male boss and co-workers from now on.

–Downtown C train

Overheard by: amused passenger

Yuppie: It was the most intense Hava Nagilah I’d ever seen.

–43rd & Lex

Yuppie, examining the New York Public Library: Wow, that library is such a waste of real estate!

–42nd & 5th Avenue

Overheard by: Reader Rabbit

Emo Girl to friend: Oh I love Whole Foods, its like Wal-Mart for Yuppies.

–Whole Foods, Union Square

Overheard by: Addie Wagenknecht

Yuppie, to McDonald’s cashier: Do you have French vanilla capuccino?

–McDonald’s, 34th & 10th

And Correlate Them to Market Trends, Will You?

Female trader: Oh my god, I’ve been so busy lately.
Eager new hire: Is there anything I can help you with?
Female trader: Well, I’ve actually been too busy to read ABC blog* and XYZ blog* today. If you could write me up a summary, that would be great.
Eager new hire: Uh, sure.

–Trading Floor

Overheard by: PageSixisBetter

Just a Little Bit Of Wednesday One-Liner Repeating

Mother to child in front of diorama of pilgrims and Native Americans: Well, that’s because the Indians never met real people before.

–Museum of Natural History

Overheard by: Peter R.

Young girl, arriving through train tunnel at Grand Central Station: I wonder if Harriet Tubman is down here.

–Grand Central Station

Airhead: I think like… Colonialization is like… The umbrella theme of, like… Diplomacy.

–Pommes Frites

History teacher, about Andrew Jackson: He tight, he kill mad people, he buggin’.

–High School

Teacher, discussing Thomas Jefferson’s mistress: You see, guys? History is exciting! It’s full of sex!

–High School, Lower Manhattan

Overheard by: SzN31

Blackout Fun

Hysterical Man: The bridge is swinging! Everybody get off the bridge!
Reasonable Man: It’s supposed to swing! This is a suspension bridge!

–Brooklyn Bridge