Archive for 2015

A Gentrifier in Sid’s Clothing

Punk chick: So how much should I take out?
Punk guy: Yeah, you should take out like $7,000. Or better yet $10,000. Better too much than too little.
Punk chick: OK…
Punk guy: Yeah, but wait until we get out of the city to take it out, like Long Island. You don’t want to be walking around Brooklyn with that kind of cash…it would be like b‑boy lottery.

–A train

A Relationship Is Out of the Question

Girl #1, feeling her breasts: Oh my gosh! I know I’m not fat or anything, but my boobs are so heavy!
Girl #2: Uhhh, yeah…
Girl #1: Something’s wrong — they are way too heavy. Feel them!
Girl #2: Um, I don’t think–
Girl #1: –Just do it, seriously!
Girl #2, holding breast: They feel okay…
Girl #1: I think they’re too heavy. Actually hold them.
Girl #2, tightening grip: Uh, have I never told you I’m bisexual?
Girl #1: Oh… Well… Have you ever wanted to date me or something?
Girl #2: Not date you… But I’ve always wanted to have a threesome with you.

–F train

So Women Vibrated, Which Was Pretty Cool

NYU professor: And so the Chinese invented statistics to take censuses. (to girl) Would you have been counted?
Girl: Um… Yes?
Guy: No, because they only counted men in the censuses.
Professor: Right, because this was back in the good old days, when men were men and women were washing machines.

–NYU Kaufman Building

Overheard by: Erin

“The guy who publishes Overheard? Really?”

Woman #1: Guess who I sat next to at dinner last night?
Woman #2: I have no clue. Jimmy Fallon?
Woman #1: No. Denzel Washington!
Woman #2: Omigod!
Woman #1: I know, I love him!
Woman #2: I loved him as God in Bruce Almighty. That was him, wasn’t it?
Woman #1: No, that was Morgan Freeman, you dumb fuck.

–45th Street 7th & 8th 

Who Says Love Is Dead?

Perky man with infant: Look, we’re passing the museum.
Tired woman with suitcase: I don’t care.
Perky man: Huh?
Tired woman: I don’t care!
Perky man: We should go to the museum sometime. Look at all the arts an’ crap.

–Downtown A Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox


It Isn’t Easy Being Us

Chick #1: I just look for things in my cabinet to overdose on. Seriously, I need to go on strong medication. I have no boyfriend, no life… I need some medicine. I need it right now. Oh my god, I’m about to cry right here. And see, I’m getting so fat. I mean, I still wear the same size and weigh the same, but I’m getting so fat. I know it’s because I’m eating breakfast again. I usually do no breakfast, then yogurt for lunch and fish or something for dinner. I know it’s because of breakfast.
Chick #2: Well, I seriously can’t go home without drinking. It’s not like I’m a huge drinker or anything, but I just can’t stay away from wine once I step in the door.

–Madison Square Park

Overheard by: Cathy Pyenson