20-ish guy: So, I should just ask: Can I come in and fuck your brains out?
20-ish girl: You don’t have to be all Tarantino about it, but yeah.
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Esther
Archive for 2016
Their Sex Life Is Kind of a Downer
Lazy guy on bike: My tailbone hurts.
Lazy girl on bike: My vagina bones hurt.
–East Village
I Use Mine as a Vacation Home
Girl #1: Oh, I thought it was a purse.
Girl #2: Yeah, but I like it as a skirt, too.
–Urban Outfitters
Overheard by: sweetchuck
And Buy Some Baggy Jeans
Dirty old hobo to passing tourist girl: Mmm, mmm, mmm… I could eat for three days off your fat pussy.
Tourist girl: I'm not fat!
Dirty old hobo: No, but your pussy sure is.
Tourist girl, rushing away: I'm gonna cry.
–Soho
It’s Those Pants That’ll Need Changing
Girl #1: Sorry I’m late. I was constipated.
Girl #2: Do you want to take your shirt off?
–21st & 3rd
A Nice Pair of Wednesday One-liners
Woman on cell: My boobs aren’t ready for this cold weather. They’re still too new.
–56th st. between 7th Ave & Broadway
Store manager: You can’t have a full facing of titties here. You just can’t.
–Jim Hanley’s Universe, 33rd & 5th
Overheard by: Vito Delsante