Archive for 2016

This Has to Do With Degrassi High How?

Tourist guy: Why are all the signs in Chinese?
New York guy: Because we’re in Chinatown.
Tourist guy: But shouldn’t they have to advertise in English?
New York guy: New York isn’t Quebec.
Tourist guy: What?
New York guy: Dude, you don’t even know the difference between Chinese and Korean, you’ll never understand a reference to Quebecoise French. 

–Bayard & Mott

Overheard by: iiams

Ah, the Beauty Of Queens

Youth #1: Would you rather be a monkey or a gay guy?
Youth #2: Gay guy.
Youth #3: Gay guy.
Youth #2: Everybody likes gay guys. And monkeys are ugly as hell.

–Sunnyside, Queens

Wednesday One-Liners Scream ‘Gender Surprise!’

Girl to friend: … And it was like, ‘Bam! I have a penis, too, man.’

–W 4th & 6th

Crazy guy: The revolution is in my pussy! The revolution is in my vagina!

–Washington Square Park

Prep school gangsta leaving train: Yo, man, grab his tits! Yeah!

–C train

Overheard by: Annearchist

Guy yelling into cell: I’m an intelligent woman! So I think…

–59th St, Columbus Circle

NYU chick: If I was a hermaphrodite, then I would totally understand what they were talking about.

–Shade, W 3rd & Sullivan

Wednesday Undie-Liners

Woman on cell: Okay, but this time please stay out of my underwear drawer.

–Astor Place

Overheard by: Jess

Overconfident guy: I know, I know. You say you have a 3.7 at NYU Law, and the panties just drop.

–Dorm, NYU Law

Overheard by: holdingbacklaughter

Little old lady on park bench to another: Well, I’ve been stuffing my bra now, and now I can’t find my money.

–Central Park West & 63rd St

Overheard by: Jen

Woman: My dog only eats my underwear. He doesn’t eat my son’s. He doesn’t eat my husband’s. Only mine! I wonder why. (pauses to think) Hmm… it must be that feminine smell.

–E 40th St

Overheard by: TMI

Livid man on cell: No! You can’t have your underwear back!