Archive for 2017

White Folks Still Claim Jesus Was A Cracker

Teen boy: Do you know where I can find those Communion wafers? I want to eat them with salsa.
Friend: Um, you can’t just eat those. It’s the body of Christ.

–Rockefeller Center

Overheard by: Jason
Headline by: Bored Beyond Belief 

Runners-Up:
· “Besides, Three Days Later You’ll Be Hungry Again” — Sparky
· “…And After Three days, He Arose, with Craving for Pico de Gallo” — Russ Wall
· “…And They’re 2000 Years Past Their Expiration Date” — John
· “And Stop Putting Salt on the Rim of the Chalice” — Amy Stephenson
· “Betcha Can’t Transubstantiate Just One” — chris
· “Body of Satan Has More Tang Anyway” — Jessica
· “Friends Don’t Let Friends Go to Church Stoned” — Pix
· “If Jesus Wanted Us to Eat Him with Salsa, He’d Be Appearing on Tortillas.… Oh… Wait.” — ilemanzer
· “Look for the Bag Marked ‘Corpus Crispy’ ” — Slept thru the Sermon
· “My God Stays Crunchy in Milk” — Benedict
· “That’s What You Said about the Last Donut, Too” — SDP
· “The Next Special Ingredient on Iron Chef” — dan
· “They’re Best Served with Dogma” — zg
· “Try the Taco Bells of St. Mary’s” — jules

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Puts the ‘Narc’ in Narcissism

Girl looking in mirror: You know what? I would make a really good-looking crack whore.
Boy: What? … Probably.

–Weinstein Residence Hall, NYU

Overheard by: Emily

Headline by: Ethan

Runners-Up:

· “All he heard was “whore”” — Marigumi

· “Holding the mirror between her legs” — anne nahm

· “I’ll agree with whatever gets me laid” — Dustin

· “Lose a few teef, add a few bruises, I be shinin’ ” — Dingolite

· “This Is Your Brain on Uggs” — NK


Click here to see the new Headline Contest