Tourist chick #1: You have to go uptown in order to go downtown to Chinatown.
Tourist chick #2: And I thought this was a non-stop…
–6 Train
Archive for 2017
Only the Resultant Brain Damage Makes It Bearable
Young male suit, about colleague getting married and moving: It’s like she’s taking this huge dive…
Young female suit: Off the high dive, into the shallow end.
–Hanover Square
Overheard by: anonanonanon
Shish Kanish Is That Falafel Place Over on Third
10-year-old white boy: Mom, you know what I’m wondering?
Mom: No, what?
10-year-old: What does “shish kanish” mean?
Mom, staring at him: What the hell are you talking about?
10-year-old: In that song by Shakira it says she makes a man wanna “shish kanish.“
Mom, shaking head: “Speak Spanish,” Cory. She made a man wanna speak Spanish. Shit, you ain’t never gonna be a singer.
–Tenement Museum
Overheard by: Excuse me while I kiss this guy
Warning: Continuation of This Conversation Could Result in Severe Loss of Tip
Tourist guy: Where are you from?
Female waitress: Sri Lanka.
Tourist guy: Oh, I’ve always wanted to go to India.
Female waitress: Did you really just say that?
–Times Square Bakery
Overheard by: trey
Queer Eye for the Homeless Guy
A sharply dressed woman offers a pair of gloves to a hobo: Sir, could you use these?
Hobo: Lady, you should know better. Those don’t match my outfit.
–23rd & 7th
She Gave Him a Hand, At Minimum
Guy #1: Oh, that really sucks. So she wouldn’t even blow you? After all that?
Guy #2: Nope.
Guy #1: Did she at least finish putting up those shelves in your closet?
–51st & 2nd
Overheard by: Kiere Walker
