Boy, 7: Who’s that guy again?
Mom: Which one?
Boy, 7: Subway.
Mother: Bernard Goetz.
–B48 bus
Archive for 2018
Bukkake Is So Five Minutes Ago
High school latina #1: Yeah, she’s really sexy.
High school latina #2: Her lips are really soft.
High school latina #3: Yeah, you guys, her eye gunk’s sexy, too. I’d totally eat her eye gunk.
High school latina #2: Yeah, that’s true. I would, too.
–1 train
Overheard by: define sexy
And How Drunk Are You?
Guy, singing: “I want to be a part of it/ New York/ New York…”
Passing woman: Where the fuck are you from?
–38th & 7th
Overheard by: Agrees with woman
YOUR HEADLINE HERE, RELOADED
Put away your skewer jokes — we’ve posted a new contest! Click here to read the entry and submit your headline. The winner of Monday’s contest will be posted this coming Monday.
Winners of this and future contests will get a copy of the book Overheard in New York, signed by Morgan Friedman (until we run out).
Wait, What Did His Family Do?
An activist tries to give a guy a pamphlet.
Guy: I don’t believe in human rights.
Activist: I hope a tyrant kills your family!
–Times Square
I Need Some Flipflops for the Next Blizzard
Shopper: Will you have spring shoes out next week?
Saleslady: What?
Shopper: Spring shoes! Next week?
Saleslady: Spring?
Shopper: Yeah, downstairs they told me you always have the next season’s shoes out one season ahead.
Saleslady: Spring?
Shopper: Yes! Spring! Next week!
–Macy’s
Overheard by: Roxy Chanel McPink
Sometimes We Feel Bad for Mocking Canadians… And Sometimes Not
Chinese-Canadian girl: Where are we going next?
Mom: Chinatown.
Girl: I thought Chinatown was in Canada…?
–Empire State Building
An Event That Can Be Enjoyed, but Not Explained
Confused Hispanic woman (feet away from tree): What is going on here?
Unenthusiastic cop: I don’t know… some big tree.
–Rockefeller Center Tree Lighting
Thank You Very Much, I’ll Be Here until Thursday
Angry rider after missing a stop: Why can’t you just pull over? You was only like this far away?
Bus driver: I can only stop at designated stops, I’m sorry.
Angry rider: You could have stopped, you just wanted to be a dick.
Bus driver: Yeah, you would know — you suck enough of it.
–BX9 bus
Overheard by: Don’t know much about it
Why Is This Beer Different From All Other Beers?
Tall guy to short guy: You gotta have a beer.
Short guy: Why do I have to have a beer if I am a rabbi?
–Grand & Broadway