Archive for 2018

The Lit­tle Wednes­day One-Lin­ers That Could

La­dy suit: Every time I get on the sub­way there’s al­ways some freak of na­ture sit­ting there. I wish they’d do some­thing about that!

–34th & 7th

Dorky teen boy: This is the sub­way sta­tion?! Wow!

–2nd floor, Port Au­thor­i­ty

Over­heard by: Jo­Bell

La­dy suit: If you smoke enough pot, the B Train be­comes the Hog­warts Ex­press!

–DeKalb sta­tion

Over­heard by: jad­ed

Blonde: I’ve on­ly ever tak­en the shut­tle from Grand Cen­tral to Times Square. I’ve nev­er gone East on it. I don’t know how.

–1 train

Over­heard by: min­er­fa

Dad to young son as doors close: Come on, come on, come on! [He holds the clos­ing doors, and they make it in­side.] Um, don’t ever do that.

–F train

Over­heard by: di­ano­ra

She Got an MFA in Strip­ping

Girl­friend: Hey, there’s a Juil­liard School in New York? I did­n’t know that! There’s a Juil­liard in Boston. It’s a mu­sic school.
Boyfriend: I don’t think there’s a Juil­liard in Boston.
Girl­friend: Yes, there is! I went to it! The New York one must be, like, a branch of the Boston one. Like Penn State in New York or Ohio, or what­ev­er.

–A train, 168th St

Over­heard by: Girl in Juil­liard T‑Shirt

Per­haps You Should Look at Your Tag

Hip­ster girl: Post-hip­ster is like post-irony, you’re be­ing iron­ic about irony.
Hip­ster guy #1: Wait, so you can be a hip­ster and hate hip­sters at the same time?
Hip­ster guy #2: I am so post-hip­ster!

–Charleston Bar, Williams­burg

Over­heard by: Matt Boorady