Archive for 2020

Many of Us Are Even at Jim’s Level

Yuppie mom #1: Can you believe that there are people living in this city who make under two hundred thousand dollars?
Yuppie mom #2: Really?
Yuppie mom #1: Yes, I’d never do that. I wouldn’t want to live like a Huckleberry Finn.

The conversation then got too low for me to hear after they saw I was eavesdropping and giving them the evil eye.

–Riverside Park

Chicks and Ducks and Geese Better Scurry

Girl: So I’m not the biggest comic fan, but these were from the thirties and I open it up and HELLO DONALD DUCK with an erection!
Guy: Whoa, porno.
Girl: Yeah, it was $4.95 which I totally had, but I mean…there was even this poem. “This is the tale of Donald Duck, he just wants a duck to fuck.”
Guy: Was he…you know?
Girl: Circumcised?

–Central Park South

NewsFlash: Hipster Is Copycat. Film at 11

Artsy girl: I cant believe you took my idea!
Bearded hipster boy: My cat died and so I can use it my way.
Artsy girl: But now everyone thinks it was your idea to skin the cat! And it was mine! Next thing you know, you'll be plucking the feathers out of birds and dipping them in blood!
Bearded hipster boy: Good idea, I think I will.
Artsy girl: Cunt!

–Outside Cooper Union School

Overheard by: jemma lower