Hipster: So I was walking down the street, and I saw Jesus, and then I was like, ‘Hey, how’s it going, Jesus?’
Overheard by: Kanad
Subway preacher: The ocean is full of water. Jesus changed water into wine. It’s all good. Michael Jackson called it ‘Jesus Juice.’
–Rockefeller Plaza subway
Overheard by: G‑Lime
Queer: I replaced my imaging of Jesus as a transvestite serial killer to an image of Jesus as a militaristic terrorist…
Queer to another: I think Jesus loves Halloween.
–23rd St, between 7th & 8th
Overheard by: adam
20-ish guy: Let me get this straight — it’s spelled like ‘Jesus,’ but it’s pronounced ‘Hey-Seuss’? That’s just weird.
–49th & 8th
Overheard by: JoBell
Bible thumper: Ladies, you may see a handsome man and think to yourself, ‘I want him to be my sugar daddy.’ Oh, yes! And he becomes your sugar daddy, and he takes you to Macy’s and he buys you a crock pot. Oh, yes! But then later he beats you with that crock pot. Oh, yes! Then you realize that it is not he who is your sugar daddy, it is really Jesus Christ who is your sugar daddy! Oh, yes!