Archive for 2020

It’s Fun­ny Be­cause It’s Per­ma­nent!

Pro­fes­sor: So there’s this study that says that left-hand­ed peo­ple have low­er evo­lu­tion­ary fit­ness.
Stu­dent: Does that mean that we’re doomed be­cause the Pres­i­dent is left hand­ed?
Pro­fes­sor, with­out miss­ing a beat: No, it just means he’s go­ing to die.

–Co­lum­bia Uni­ver­si­ty

Tell That to Sarah Jes­si­ca Park­er

Dude #1: So I’m to­tal­ly fight­ing with Mark–
Dude #2: You mean phys­i­cal­ly fight­ing, or meta­phys­i­cal­ly fight­ing?
Dude #1: Meta­phys­i­cal­ly. But does it make a dif­fer­ence?
Dude #2: Well, dude, you can’t get punched in the face, meta­phys­i­cal­ly.

–West 3rd & Mer­cer

Over­heard by: Dev Nille