Archive for January, 2021

Womb­s­day One-Lin­ers

Woman hold­ing large ice cream, to man: You don’t know what it’s like to men­stru­ate! You have no idea!

–Lafeyette & As­tor Pl

Over­heard by: I have some idea

News­pa­per guy: It’s just like when I was sell­ing tam­pons to Ali­cia Sil­ver­stone. I was like, ‘Is this my life?’

–34th & Broad­way

Chick to friends: I think my mom is go­ing through menopause. She wants to move to Col­orado.

–St. John’s Uni­ver­si­ty, Queens

Biotech to friend: Stop do­ing the tam­pon dance and let’s get out of here al­ready.

–Du­ane Reade

Well-dressed In­di­an man shout­ing at woman: You don’t need no fuck­ing tam­pons! Tam­pax — that’s a tam­pon! Tam­pax is the fuck­ing mafia!

–2 train

Over­heard by: Still Con­fused

Wheel­ing and Deal­ing (A NYC Short Sto­ry)

Chick on cell: …girl, you know I told her I would give her $5 and she would put in five. Right, so the guy gave us two dimes, right?… No, he gave us the sec­ond one for free, but it looked man­gled, so then we went out back to smoke it and hers flew away…Yeah, it flew away in­to the bush­es. Yo, I told her if she want­ed to smoke grass for re­als, that’s on her. I was like, I’m out…Right, so then I did­n’t have no mon­ey to get back on the bus be­cause my metro­card ran out at 8:30. She on­ly had a dol­lar, and I was like, “what am I sup­posed to do with a dol­lar?”.

–BX40 bus