Archive for 2021

What She Did Was Clay Mod­el­ing

20-some­thing guy to friend: You’re girl­friend’s a mod­el? Nice! (pause) My girl­friend did mod­el­ing once.
20-some­thing friend: Yeah?
20-some­thing guy: Yeah. She was too short, though.

–Prince St, So­ho

Over­heard by: Kather­ine

Ma­ma Told Me Not to Come to This Wednes­day One-Lin­er

Man on cell: So… I left my back­pack at the pri­vate se­cret ro­bot par­ty last night… Can you pick it up for me?

–Bow­ery & Spring

Over­heard by: An­nie

MILF wannabe on cell: On the Hamptons–it has the sex­i­est par­ties I’ve ever been to in the Unit­ed States: men come up to you! And dance… with you!

–Gan­sevort Rooftop

Guy on cell: So you know how I was­n’t go­ing to the Christ­mas par­ty? So some­body drags me any­way, and I walk in, and those three girls–all the ones I did it with? Are to­geth­er at the same ta­ble. And I’m like, “shit, man!” So I left.

–As­tor Place

30-some­thing girl: Me and my girl­friend went to the bar for an an­ti-valen­tines day par­ty last night. You bring a pic­ture of your ex, they rip it up, and give you a free drink!

–7th Ave & 39th

Over­heard by: Car­olyn

Of Course, I Missed Like Every Sci­ence Class Ever

Hip­ster girl: Gosh, I’m like Pavlov’s dog!
Guy: What the hell is that?
Hip­ster girl: You don’t know? They teach it in, like, every sci­ence class ever!
Guy: So, what is it?
Hip­ster girl: It has some­thing to do with bells and drool, I’m not re­al­ly sure.

–Wash­ing­ton Square Park

Over­heard by: Tres Chic