Archive for 2022

We’ve Determined You Might Accidentally Eat a Key

Chick: Excuse me, how much is it to use the computers?
Clerk: Two-fifty for 15 minutes.
Chick: So, how much is it for an hour?
Clerk: Ten dollars.
Chick: No, it’s not!
Clerk: … Yes, it is.
Chick: No way! It’s not! Stop lying!
Clerk: You know what? You can’t use the computers. Get out.

–Computer cafe, 7th Ave, Park Slope

Overheard by: Tech Monkey

Also Because You’re Wearing Short-shorts and Rollerskates

Teenage boy #1: All I’m saying is it’s false advertising. If you suck dick, you should say you suck dick.
Teenage boy #2: But then everyone will think you’re a fag.
Teenage boy #3: No, no way. You’re telling me that just because I meet a guy whose dick I want to suck, people will think I’m a fag?

–The Loop, Prospect Park, Brooklyn

Overheard by: octopus

Wednesday One-liners Bring It

Girl: Like, my grandmother got stabbed with an ice pick by her brother. And then they were estranged for years. 

–Bobst Library, Washington Square South