Archive for the ‘Democrats’ Category

That Makes Judah Benjamin the First Neocon

Girl: Independence Day? I don’t believe people are celebrating it this year, what with the war and everything!
Guy: Yeah…
Girl: I mean people want to celebrate like everything is fine, while we have the worst President ever in office fucking everything up!
Guy: I wouldn’t say that…
Girl: What? How can you say that? Name another President who has done more to fuck up this country?
Guy: Well, we will always have Jefferson Davis.

–Park Slope

Wednesday One-Liners for Tammany Hall

Girl with Obama pin: Oh my god, I can’t believe I spent this whole night hanging out with a Republican!

–104th St & Manhattan Ave

Overheard by: Emily

Guy to friends: There’s only one thing I want him to shove down my throat, and it’s not his Republican ideals.

–43rd & 8th

Gov’t. Teacher: Sometimes you wanna smack a moderate.

–Curtis High School, Staten Island

Overheard by: jules

Woman: I blame McCain for the snow.

–St. Mark’s & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Philip & Richard

Wednesday One-Liners for Change

Black lady to family in obama t‑shirts: You know how all those irish people have pictures of kennedy hanging up in their living rooms? Now we can do that too!

–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Definitely has a JFK picture in her apartment

Guy selling obama-themed condoms: Remember the election with every erection!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Mary Button

Black woman with a child in her stroller braiding her hair: There’s gona be a lot of braidin in the white house.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Subway surfer

Woman on cell phone: Girl, if I can get to the front of the line at the vma’s I can get to the front of the line at the damn inauguration. Shiiiit it’s barack obama, girl!

–manhattan dental waiting room

Overheard by: Catherine

Stoned kid to a group of his friends discussing politics: You know what’s scary bro? If obama gets assassinated, george bush is gonna be president again.

–1 Train @ 2AM going Downtown

Black man handing out metro: “get your obama metro! Get your obama metro! See, anyone can be president… I’m next!”

–59th Street, Lexington Ave

Overheard by: Yes we can!

Let’s Chip in and Get Wednesday One-Liners a GPS for Christmas

Confused American: I used to think Atlantic City was in Atlantic State.

–Downtown A Train

Overheard by: MBS

Drunk guy: I don’t understand why people are giving Sarah Palin so much grief over that Russia thing. It really *is* pretty close to Alaska.

–W 66th St

Overheard by: Emily B.

Anti-McCain dude to another: Man, Sarah Palin is crazy. Yo, she’s just crazy. Why did John McCain even pick her? She’s not even an American citizen, she’s Alaskan!

–The Bronx

Nervous white lady: Um, is the Broadway/Lafayette stop coming up soon?

–Uptown 1 Train

UPS guy to lost tourists: I’m not a GPS! I’m the UPS!

–Prince & Lafayette

Overheard by: dee