Hot girl to male friend: Do you want to go by Yves Saint Laurent and see the dress I would suck a thousand dicks for?
–57th St & Madison Ave
Guy to friend: Pop a couple, that shit'll get ya dick up!
–Broadway & 36th St
Overheard by: Mikhail
Crazy man yelling in station to cops: Do you got two dicks and one ball? Cuz I got one dick and two balls!
–6 Train
Guy shouting into cell: Fuck! Now my dick's gonna be stuck to the wrapper!
–West Village
