Insults

Bellhop #1: Oops… Almost forgot to bring my blueberry and honey-flavored tea!
Bellhop #2: Don’t forget your vagina.

The Cliff House
Manitou Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: AR

Girl #1: Do you think the actress who plays the deaf girl on Weeds is actually deaf? She looks deaf.
Girl #2: You're retarded.
Girl #1: That's not very PC.

overheardatnu.blogspot.com

Overheard by: jessica l

Student, spreading arms wide: I hate you this much!
Teacher: Well, that’s certainly less than earlier.

High school
Arcadia, California

Overheard by: The Know It All

Drunk watching a pool game: You’re a retard!
Girl playing pool: I’m a retard? I’m not the one with chalk on my nipples!

Kansas

Girl to guys talking about their Easter candy: You know, I just want to point out that you’re both 23 and still getting Easter candy from your parents.
Guy #1: Hey, it’s not like I asked for it!
Guy #2: And besides, it’s not from my mom. It’s from the bunny.

PETCO Park
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Danette

Guy #1: I would sacrifice myself to save the rest of the world. Wouldn't you?
Guy #2: Naw, man. Fuck the world.

Chino, California

Girl to friends: Fuck Europe! I got Tanzania all up on my ass!

Atlanta, Georgia

Random guy: Man, you just gotta cowboy the fuck up and tell the dumb bitch you’re doing her in the ass!

Moe’s Southwest Grill
Norman, Oklahoma

Girl on bus: I've been trying to quit drinking and she was all like, “have some juice with me!” And then she pulls out a half gallon of vodka, and I'm all, “bitch, what you doing?”

Seattle, Washington

Crazy old white lady trying on wedding veil: So I always wondered why I didn't look good in these things…until 2004.
Disinterested customer: Oh?
Crazy old white lady: Yeah, then I found out I was part Native American. At least 5%.
Disinterested customer (confused): Oh…?
Crazy, old white lady: Yeah. That's why I don't look good in veils. Cause we Native Americans don't wear them.
Disinterested customer: I got married in a courthouse.
Crazy old white lady: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white people!

Goodwill
Altoona, Pennsylvania