Conductor, leaning out window to couple making out: Get a room!
–Canal St station
Overheard by: simon
Eerily calm guy: You fucked me. You fucked me in Midtown.
–48th & 5th
Overheard by: Nick Draven
Hot dog vendor, about girl moaning on cell: They’re having sex on the corner, people! Don’t look!
–Main St & 38th Ave, Queens
Drunk girl to kissing friends: You know, we can, like, find a place for you to make out.
–Prince St
Sorostitute: I had sex right there.
–64th & 5th
Drunk girl: I remember the bouncing, I remember the moaning, I just can’t remember the name.
–Cooper 35, Astor Place
Overheard by: dan
Gay man: I went there to get spiritual, and I came back all ‘Boys, boys, boys.’
–5th Ave & 11th St
Chick on cell: This is one of those moments when polyamory would really come in handy, huh?
–Harlem
Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy
Girl talking to herself: I am not a ho — I took the lie detector test, and it told you I was not a ho so stop calling me that.
–1 train
Overheard by: will
Chick: She had, like, 20 brothers and sisters because her dad was Haitian and he just kept sleeping with people…
–Subway bar, 60th & Lex
Chick: This year I am going to try and not make out with both Samatha and her boyfriend.
–W 53rd between 9th and 10th Ave
Overheard by: Still Laughing
College girl #1: …and this guy’s a really good kisser and they turn on the lights and it’s your dad!
College girl #2: Oh my god, I know! I hate it when that happens!
–5th Ave. & 13th St.
Overheard by: Dave Della Costa
Man in chair, reaching out to accept money: Okay, man…
Other man, handing him money: Damn, man! (looks at his hands) You need a pedicure! Remind me to hook you up!
–The Rides, Coney Island
Overheard by: cracking up
Guy: I really wanna kiss you right now.
Girl: So who does that make you: my uncle or my dad?
–Bar, Carroll Gardens
Hobo: Anyone have a $50 bill?…How ’bout you?
Chick: What?
Hobo: Are there any rich people on this train?
Chick: No.
Hobo: You like me? Wanna give me a kiss?
–6 train
Overheard by: S.D. & S.H.
Teen girl to sailor in uniform: Can you do me a huge favor and let me kiss you?
Sailor: Man, you’re really twisting my arm huh?
–Top of Empire State Building
Drunk girl #1: Call me tomorrow morning and tell me how you feel!
Drunk girl #2: I’ll be just fine cuz I just made out with Travis.
–19th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: k
Chick #1: Did you make out with a hooker?
Dude: I didn’t *make out* with anyone!
Chick #2: Did you seventh-grade kiss a hooker?
Chick #1: Did you seventh-grade *think* about kissing a hooker?
Dude: I didn’t even know she was a hooker until twenty minutes into our conversation!
–F Train
Teenage girl #1: Then he was kissing my forehead a lot after we hooked up so I told everyone there he was gay.
Teenage girl #2: Yeah, that is really gay.
–Houston St station
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist