Wednesday One-Liners Spend Most of Their Time Fundraising

Man to guy trying to avoid him: Because, you see — all Republicans are Nazis. I don’t know why no one else can tell.

–67^th & Broadway

Overheard by: kendra

Thug to another: Damn, nigga! That’s why the Democrats ain’t going to win the motherfuckin’ White House in 2008!

–Union Square

Overheard by: guy who’s not sure if it’s racist or not

Righteous girl: I am glad I slept with him before I found out he was a Republican.

–6 train, Uptown

Overheard by: Susan

Rollerblading twelve-year-old to friend: Sean Hannity is such a douche!

–44^th and 8^th

Anti-Bush crazy at anti-war stand on the street: There’s an idiot in the White House! There’s an idiot in the White House! .… Actually, he’s a monkey — we got the DNA results back!

–Outside of the Met

Man on cell: Well, they killed 3,000 people! …Nooo, not the Arabs, the Conservatives — the New York Conservatives!

–181 St & Ft. Washington, Starbucks

Overheard by: One of the teachers

Hobo: I hope I never run for office, because you people aren’t the first group I’ve said fucked-up shit to.

–F Train

Pretty Much Speaks for Itself

Alabaman, about MLK Day: Yeah, well, down in Alabama we don’t celebrate his birthday, but the day he was shot.
College kid: Uh…

–49^th & 3^rd

New York’s Only Republican

Woman: Did you just watch the Presidential debate?
Man: Yes, we did.
Woman: Are you Kerry supporters?
Man: No, of course not. Kerry is the worst presidential candidate in the last 50 years and he would be the worst president ever.
Woman: Oh, do you want to come to Good Morning America tomorrow and stand outside, waving Kerry signs?
Man: I was being entirely serious. I hate Kerry.

The woman looks at him, unbelieving, and walks away in silence.

–Outside the San Marcos bar, East Village

It’s Chappaqua

Hobo: Come on out, Democrats. Admit it. You fucked up. Admit it. You voted for John Kerry. You fucking Democrats. You voted for someone who likes to dress up like a pixie.
Dude: I wonder what the address is on his voter registration card.

–18^th & Irving

The New York Marginalized

Columbia University student #1: The most marginalized group on campus are the college Republicans
Columbia University student #2: No, it’s the Christians

– Private get-together of Columbia students, East Village

Putting the DNC Back in Dancing

Guy: Are you more of a Democrat or a Republican?
Girl: Hmm. That’s a tough one. It’s like being in West Side Story.

–Tennessee Mountain, SoHo

Blackout in Williamsburg

Hipster screamed out: “Michael Bloomberg has electricity now!”

Bill O’Reilly Wasn’t the Easiest Kid to Raise.

Small boy zipping by on scooter: What’s that word again?
Mother, following behind him: “Conspiracy.“
Small boy: Tax conspiracy!

–Prospect Heights, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Katie Naum

An Old-School Reagan Republican

Tight jeans #1: It’s like the only way to be a punk these days is to be a Republican.
Tight jeans #2: I know.

–2^nd Ave, between 7^th & 8^th St

Overheard by: Tim

She’s Just an Enthusiastic Lesbian

Old woman cheering for President Bush’s passing caravan: Viva Bush! Viva Bush!
Younger woman: Well, at least one out of a million New Yorkers ain’t bad.

–50^th St & 2^nd Ave

Overheard by: ~emily

Overheard In New York

Archive for the ‘Republicans’ Category