Mom to children: Don't touch the building! This is a very dirty city! You are going to get really, really sick!
–Herald Square
Middle aged Italian guy to lady friend on bench: I have a bidet, a portable one where you flip it on and it goes under you and it cleans you. I don't like being dirty.
–7th Ave & 9th St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Jon
Angry middle aged woman: Anne, when you've got a minute… I'm covered in grease.
–49th & 7th
Female conductor, over PA system: Do not put your feet on the seats, people! These are seats, not footrests–and you are not the only one who rides this train! You think other passengers wanna sit in the dirt offa your shoes? God, I can't believe I even hafta be tellin' you this!
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Morning Glory
