You Can Get Anywhere in New York by Wednesday One-Liner

Man playing guitar, as train approaches: Traaaain solo! Performed for you by the MTA mechanical device.

–L Train

Overheard by: Marni

2-year-old girl, repeated once for each cycle of the subway car's information strips: 96th Street! 96th Street! 96th Street!

–2 Train

Tough guy to skinny yuppie guy inside train: Yo, you better hold on to something, or else you might fall. And if you fall on me, I am gonna fuck you up.

–1 Train

Suit to another: I don't know why the trains can't be on time. Now I know why people throw themselves in front of trains. They want to end their life but also fuck over NJ Transit.

–Commuter Rail

Overheard by: lee

Scruffy man in the back of the train, as most people exit it: Now everyone, get out of my car!

–A Train