Woman on cell: When you as­sume, you make an ass of your­self.

–4th Ave, Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: Mark

Hip­ster: Yo, what’s up with Filene’s Base­ment? That shit’s on the top floor!

–Union Square

Over­heard by: Hobo Whis­per­er

Tourist: Is that the En­ron build­ing?

–Times Square

Over­heard by: Robyn

Tourist to se­cu­ri­ty guard: Are these all orig­i­nals?

–Im­pres­sion­ist Gallery, the Met

Over­heard by: j‑diddy

Fe­male tourist: I could nev­er live in Cen­tral Amer­i­ca be­cause I’d miss the ocean.

–Restau­rant bath­room, Lit­tle Italy

Over­heard by: Olia

Girl look­ing at sub­way map: What about that thing, that star–“You are here”? They don’t have that?

–(Mov­ing) up­town 1 train, 59th St

Over­heard by: Jo

White hip­ster girl: Is black se­men black?

–86th & Park