Girl #1: You should look at profiles with me. It’s like shopping.
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s like “Would this one look good on me?”
–Dive 75, UWS
- Posted on September 29, 2023
- Girls, Internet, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center
Businessman: …and once word gets out that you like to fuck girls with no legs, everybody thinks you’re a freak!
Crony: Yeah, I bet.
Businessman: I’ll send you the pictures.
–Maiden Lane & Water St.
Overheard by: Dave Kelleher
- Posted on September 28, 2023
- Handicaps, Kink, Suits, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport
Woman: Excuse me. I have to put something in my dryer.
Girl folding clothes: Oh, okay.
Woman: Excuse me! I have to put something else in my dryer.
Girl: O-kay…
Woman: Now I have to take something out of my dryer…unbelievable.
Girl: Wow, you’re a case!
Woman: I’m a what?!
Girl: A case. I’ve never seen anybody so worked up over laundry.
Woman: Well, you haven’t lived very long, have you?
Girl: Not as long as you!…Have a nice day!
Woman: Fuck you!
–York Launderette, York Avenue and E. 82nd
- Posted on September 28, 2023
- Age/Aging, Always Bringing it Back to You!, Anger Management, Biotechs, Clothing, Girls, Insults, Laundromat, Psychology, Upper East Side, Women
Thug #1: I don’t live in the VHS era.
Thug #2: Naw, they got DVD tapes now.
–J train
Overheard by: Anna
- Posted on September 27, 2023
- Movies, On the Subway, Stupidity, Thugs
Guy on cell: I’m at Avenue of the Americas and…Little Brazil Street.
–W. 46th Street & 6th Avenue
A woman in a stupid fleece hat says to her friends, also in stupid fleece hats: This is my backyard when I’m not at the house!
–Central Park, 5th & 59th
Overheard by: Kat Martinez
- Posted on September 27, 2023
- All Wednesday One-Liners, Central Park, History & Geography, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, NYC Geography, On Cell, People, Places
Student: It’s not computers that’s fucking you up, it’s General Hospital.
–Pratt dorm, Willoughby Avenue
Overheard by: Eric Wrenn
Girl, 7: Sometimes, I wonder: who really did kill Kenny?
–M79 bus
- Posted on September 26, 2023
- All Wednesday One-Liners, Brooklyn, On the Bus, Students, TV
Guy: I drink so much coffee, that if my girlfriend gives me a blowjob she can’t sleep all night afterwards.
–Wall St. Starbucks
Black chick: It smells like the bottom of a slave ship in here.
–Sapphire Lounge, LES
- Posted on September 26, 2023
- All Wednesday One-Liners, BJs, Scents of the City, Wednesday One-Liners, Wednesday One-Liners Vary
Hobo: Folks, help me out. I am trying to get my rotor blade fixed on my helicopter!
–W. 10th and 7th Ave
Overheard by: Alex Wipf
Connecticut woman: It was such a joke among my friends; I was always going out with artists or unemployed people…which I guess is the same thing.
–Cuppa Cuppa, East Village
- Posted on September 25, 2023
- All Wednesday One-Liners, Artists, Dating, Hobos, Homeless, Jobs & Careers, Manhattan, Money & Class, People, Places, Restaurants & Cafes, Sex & Relationships, Topics, Union Square and East Village, Venues, West Village
Girl on cell: …and it was right after he said that that I started doing double penetration, and I’ve never looked back.
–C train
Overheard by: Mickey Marx
Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the B train. B like, like, like, um, brothel.
–B train
Overheard by: ed
- Posted on September 25, 2023
- All Wednesday One-Liners, Backdoor, On the Subway, Prostitution, Public Transportation, Wednesday One-Liners Vary
Girl on cell: I knew it was over when I grabbed his shirt and he told me I was pulling his hair.
–Bleecker & W. 11th
Overheard by: Alaska
Guy: Yeah, but the guy’s the Michael Jackson of dishwashing…
–Houston Street & Avenue B
Overheard by: Andrew Williams
- Posted on September 24, 2023
- About Celebrities, All Wednesday One-Liners, Breaking Up, Celebrities, Jobs & Careers, Union Square and East Village, West Village