Guy: Why would I struggle with a bigger woman?
Friend: Because you are not agile!
–49th & 3rd
- Posted on June 9, 2023
- Compare/Contrast, Fighting and ass kicking, Friends, Guys, Midtown & Hell’s Kitchen, Questions
Girl: It’s weird: I’m a cross between a radical feminist and a frat boy.
Boy: It’s because you love drinking and fucking.
Girl: And critical theory!
–Rudy’s, 44th & 9th
Overheard by: holden caufield
- Posted on June 9, 2023
- Bars & Clubs, Boys, Compare/Contrast, Drinking & Drunk People, Gender issues, Girls, Midtown & Hell’s Kitchen, Sex, Weirdness
Dumb blonde #1: What do they even have in Boston, anyway?
Dumb blonde #2: I don’t know, like chowder, or lobster…
Dumb blonde #1: Nuh‐uh, you’re so stupid. The best lobster is totally in Nashville. I know cuz I’ve had it.
–Equitable Building, 120 Broadway
- Posted on June 8, 2023
Woman: She brought a bottle of vodka on the plane with her. She was doing shots the whole flight.
–Central Park
Overheard by: sarah
Conductor: The next stop is Cherry Hill, but for the men singing, it was alcohol.
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Date Rape
Smooth operator: Don’t worry, I thought you were pretty before I got drunk.
–Subway
Party girl: Yeah, so I did like 10 shots and woke up the next day wearing only one shoe and a sombrero.
–51st St & Broadway
Hobo: Ladies and gentlemen, I have spent all my money on alcohol and marijuana and drugs… But now, I have learned my lesson. I want to spend all your money on alcohol and marijuana and drugs… and viagra…
–Union Square, uptown 6 train
Guy: Dude, I can’t get that drunk. I am trying to fuck that girl tonight.
–Outside Columbia dorm
Bimbette: Oh my god, it was a terrorist act! I’m going to the wine bar.
–68th St & York
- Posted on June 8, 2023
- All Wednesday One‐Liners, Bars & Clubs, Beauty, Bimbettes, Central Park, College, Columbia (& Barnard), Columbia University, Conductors, Drinking & Drunk People, Drugs, Ew, Jersey, Guys, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Hobos, Homeless, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell’s Kitchen, On the Subway, Pick‐up Lines, Places, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Terrorism, Topics, Upper East Side, Venues, Weed, Women, Yeaaahhh College!
Dad to sullen goth son: Are you okay?
Goth: I will be…someday.
–Midtown
Skinny, black charity mugger: Hey, look at you! Help feed the homeless!
Chubby white chick: No, sorry.
Skinny, black chugger: You, feed the homeless!
Chubby white chick: Sorry, no thanks, I’m late.
Skinny, black chugger: You big enough to feed the homeless!
–Broadway & 10th
Overheard by: booksandlibretti
- Posted on June 7, 2023
- Black People, Diet/Weight, Fat People, Food, Money & Class, Skinny People, The Village, White People
Middle‐aged woman: I’ve had three pregnancies so far this year!
–Union Square
Classy gal to friend: I said, “listen bitch, I would beat you up, but you’re fucking pregnant!”
–Forest Hills
Overheard by: astoria mets fan
Ghetto girl to another: I don’t know how it happened! He pulls out all the time!
–Uptown 1 Train
Overheard by: Chris Harmison
Overweight girl: I wish I was pregnant again. They treat you special when you’re pregnant.
–W 39th St
- Posted on June 6, 2023
Gay man in hipster glasses, sticking ass out: Papi! It hurts! Open it up and see what’s wrong!
Blonde white girl, whining: But what does that meeeeeeannnnn?
–Bleecker & Perry
- Posted on June 6, 2023
- Girls, Health and Hygiene, Hipsters, Offers and requests, Queer guys, Questions, Weirdness, West Village, White People
Blonde tourist #1: I think we have plenty of time before our train leaves. What time is it?
Blonde tourist #2: I have no idea. My cell phone is dead. [To passing suit] Um, sir? Do you know what time it is?
Suit, rolling his eyes up at huge clock, then at blondes: Nope.
–Grand Central info booth with four‐sided clock on top
Overheard by: Matt
- Posted on June 5, 2023
- Grand Central, Time, Tourists
Junior #1: Are you gonna audition for Guys and Dolls?
Junior #2: Meh, that musical’s not for me, I’m really not into the whole “Cuba” thing.
Junior #3: But, it’s not all in Cuba…
Junior #2: It’s also cause I have a really hard time throwing dice well, and I heard that’s a big part of it.
Junior #1: That’s why I always win at Monopoly.
Junior #3: What where we talking about?
Junior #2: Monopoly.
–LaGuardia High School
Overheard by: Taylor
- Posted on June 4, 2023
