Queer: So how was your date?
Hispanic chick: Oh, it was nice, he was nice and sweet, and a real gentleman, you know, he would hold open doors, make sure to walk between me and the street, you know, really nice.
Queer: Oh, you know what that totally screams?
Hispanic chick: What?
Queer: That totally screams: I want to get into your vagina right now!
–6 train
Overheard by: Luke Reynolds
- Posted on
- Dating, Etiquette, Latinos, On the Subway, Queer guys, Vagina
Duane Reade cashier: Hey! Hey, security! What’s your name?
Duane Reade security: Huh?
Dunae Reade cashier: Your name, fool! What’s your name?
Duane Reade security: Wiggy.
Duane Reade cashier: What?
Duane Reade security: Wiggy. W-I-G-G-Y. That’s not my government name though.
–Duane Reade, Broadway & Canal
Overheard by: K. Thor Jensen
- Posted on
- Clerks, Duane Reade, Names, Nicknames & name calling
Jewish guy: You know, all the famous people are Jewish, like Einstein, and–
Black guy: Man, shut the fuck up, what the fuck is wrong with you? Ain’t you ever heard of Martin Luther King, Jr.? He ain’t Jewish; hell, that motherfucker ain’t even white. Jesus Fucking Christ!
Jewish guy: Very good! Jesus Christ!
–E train
Overheard by: Ting
- Posted on
- Black People, Jews, Judaism, On the Subway
Girl: What are those, prune juice bottles?
Boi: Yeah, what kind of weird homage to regularity is that?
Girl: I think it’s an homage to diarrhea.
–Park Slope
- Posted on
- Diet/Weight, Park Slope, Poop
Chick: He keeps checking himself into rehab, but then he gets out and…well, you know all his friends are crackheads.
Guy: That’s pretty funny, actually.
Chick: Yeah, it is!
–N train
- Posted on
- Drugs, Friendship, On the Subway
Woman: What’s passover again? Isn’t that supposed to be like your version of Easter?
–LaGuardia
Overheard by: Aaron
- Posted on
- Holidays, Idiots, Judaism, LaGuardia Airport, One-liners, Stupidity
Little girl, 3: Daddy, can we hear about Pythagoras again?
–116th Street station
Overheard by: djlindee
- Posted on
- Kids, Trains Not Subway
Mom #1: Did your husband take any time off when you had your baby?
Mom #2: Well, it was right after Sept. 11th, so his office was closed for 3 or 4 weeks.
Mom #1: Oh, that’s wonderful!
–F train
- Posted on
- Babies, History & Geography, Moms, On the Subway, Stupidity
Guy #1: What are you drinking?
Guy #2: Dos Equis. With a lime.
Guy #1: All Mexican beers come with limes.
Guy #2: Dude, all Mexicans come with limes.
–Croxley Ales, Avenue B
- Posted on
- Bars & Clubs, Drinking & Drunk People, Food, Friends, Race, Union Square and East Village
Yankee fan: The Yankees are kicking ass this year.
Straphanger: They’re in last place!
–3 train
- Posted on
- Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, On the Subway, Yankees