Woman: When you get to be my age, everybody looks like somebody. And some people pass by twice.
–Lincoln Center
Asian girl: Oh, no! No one had sex on the floor. I mean, OK, so a few of us girls were rolling around on the floor in our bra and panties or whatever but no one was having sex on the floor!
–St. John’s University
Overheard by: Megan Cowles
Chick #1 looking at life-like dildo that actually cums: I wonder what it cums.
Chick #2: If it were me, I would put in vanilla milkshake.
Chick #1: Oh my god! How amazing would it be if guys came vanilla milkshakes?! I would be on my knees all day long!
Chick #2: Yeah, totally… What a cruel joke that most of them taste like steamrolled, year-old sushi.
–The Pink Pussycat
Overheard by: Sharon Sloan
High school girl #1: Oh my god, I hate her, like, I have never hated anyone more.
High school girl #2: I know! She is such a slut. (pause) We're talking about Chantel, right?
High school girl #1: No, I was talking about Lacey. (pause) You think Chantel is a slut?
–Outside MoMA
30-something guy: Don't tell me you have a boyfriend, I know that's not true.
20-something girl: Actually, I wasn't going to say that. I was going to say “I don't do dick.” But cool, have a nice day! (smiles and leaves)
–Grand Central Shuttle
Girl #1, smoking: She was such a lesbian. She made vegetable lasagna. Vegetable lasagna!
Girl #2, in disbelief: Wait–so her culinary choices dictate her sexuality?
Girl #1: Well, then she fingered me.
–Zombie Hut, Smith St
Overheard by: double d
Child: Mommy! Mommy! [Pointing at track worker] Look, that man is going to kill himself.
Mom: No, honey, he is just fixing the tracks so we don’t crash with another train.
Child: So that means he is saving our lives by risking his. What a dumbass!
–7 train
Overheard by: Feziie Fez
Female college student on cell: Sorry, there was an incident. She was eating string cheese, and I told her she looked like a walrus. So she tried to smack me in the face but she couldn't, and I ran into the bathroom. So she tried to hit me with the string cheese, but I was like your string cheese will get all fuzzy. So she smacked me in the face with the cheese.
–Penn Station
Girl on phone: And then I stuck a string cheese in the microwave. Yeah, in the wrapper.
–57th & 7th
Sexy guy, looking at orchestra program description of movement "con brio": Does that mean "with cheese"?
–Camerata Notturna Concert, W. 57th St
Overheard by: Ladle
Older European woman to another: She's fine with the reference to cheese. I mean, she can eat cheese, just not the real kind.
–Union Square
Hipster: So she writes everything down in her cheese diary…
–Bedford & 4th
Girl #1: So, how was it?
Girl #2: Pretty disappointing, really. Another guy with a great dick and no idea what to do with it.
–Varick & Franklin
Overheard by: Tell me about it
Pillow fighting girl to pillow fighting guy: Oh my gosh! Is that blood on your pillow?
Pillow fighting guy: No, I think I just hit a clown.
–NYC Pillow Fight 2009, Wall Street
Overheard by: Glory
Columbia student: Do you go to NYU?
NYU student: Yes, how did you know?
Columbia student: I could tell by your dirty shoes. NYU gets their students from the homeless shelter.
NYU student: Excuse me?
Columbia student: I’m your biggest enemy.
NYU student: What?
Columbia student: I go to Columbia.
NYU student: Can you leave me alone?
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Overheard by: Cooper Union Student
