Guy: Can you get your backpack out of my back?
Boy: There’s nowhere to put it.
Guy: Why don’t you put it in your ass?
–M86 bus
- Posted on
- Ass, Assholes, Etiquette, On the Bus, Public Transportation
Girl #1: You can’t eat that chicken. There was a bug in it.
Girl #2: But I’m so hungry.
Girl #1: What kind of bug is it anyways?
Girl #2: I don’t know. I feel like crying.
–Waverly Diner
- Posted on
- Animals & Nature, Food, Insects, People, Teens
Girl: When we were younger, we totally took for granted the fun in playing Spin the Bottle…I would love to play now but it wouldn’t be the same.
Man: Yeah, playing now would just end with an abortion two months later.
Girl: Ugh.
–Broadway & 46th
Overheard by: Jeff Rigby
- Posted on
- Abortion, Girls, Health and Hygiene, Hook Ups, Kids, Manhattan, Men, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, People, Places, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Topics
Guy #1: Man, it’s cold in here.
Guy #2: That’s cause your momma’s pussy is so loose.
–A train
Overheard by: Chris Harris
- Posted on
- Guys, On the Subway, Parents, Vagina
Black teen boy #1: What the hell is this?
Black teen boy #2: What are you, stupid? This is what they call
misinterpretive dancing.
–Union Square
- Posted on
- Black People, Boys, Dancing, Insults, Questions, Teens, Union Square and East Village
Tourist husband: Sure smells bad around here.
Tourist wife: It says Dog Run.
Tourist husband: A place where dogs race?
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Innocent XXX
- Posted on
- Man's Best Friend, Poop, The Village, Tourists
Guy: It’s really been my dream to start writing for Teen Vogue.
Chick: That is quite possibly the gayest sentence ever uttered.
–Random House cafeteria, 56th & Broadway
Overheard by: djlindee
- Posted on
- Books & Writing, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Queer guys
Father: You wanna go pee-pee here?
Son: No!
Father: C’mon, I’ll hold you up, you can go in the trash can.
Son: No! I don’t wanna, they can see!
Father: Who? Oh, don’t worry, it’s not Sunday.
–84th & Park
Overheard by: Gabriel Lombardi
- Posted on
- Dads, Kids, Pee, Upper East Side
Chick: Okay guys, I’m going to subway surf in heels. I haven’t done it in so long, I hope I don’t fail.
Old man: You will fail.
Chick: Oh…
Old man: 75% of your weight is on your toes, only 25% is on your heel. You will fall. That’s from 25 years of martial arts experience.
–R train
Overheard by: Alyson Leigh
- Posted on
- Girls, Old People, On the Subway, Weirdness
Woman: It’s a pity about that actress who stabbed someone with her knife. What’s her name? …Um…Reese?
Chick: Witherspoon?
Woman: No! With her knife!
–Central Park
Overheard by: Emilia
Suit #1: I know where we are.
Suit #2: Where?
Suit #1: On the corner!
–9th Street & 1st Avenue
Overheard by: Your Mom
Guy: Excuse me, can I tell you a joke?
Girl: …What?
Guy: Can I tell you a joke?
Girl: …No.
Guy: Are you su–
Girl: Didn’t you fucking hear me, you idiot?
She gets up and starts walking away.
Girl: Jesus Christ, these fucking…
–Central Park
