Wow, I'm Even Smarter Than I Thought

Little kid: Mom, what language they speak in England?
Mother: English.
Little kid: How do you say “hi” in English?
Mother: “Hi”, you are speaking English. –85th St & Amsterdam Ave

That’s the Axe Effect, You Gauche Biotech

A crazy man mutters to a girl walking by. She ignores him and keeps walking. Crazy man: God kill all the lesbians. God please kill all the lesbians. Kill the lesbians. God please kill all the lesbians!
Woman on bench: Yeah, I’m sure it’s because she is a lesbian, and had has nothing to do with the fact that he has three combs stuck in his afro and smells like a dead goat. –Columbus Circle station

My Friend's From Special K-Town, Sir

Girl on street: Where are we?
Friend: K-town.
Girl on street: Oh really? Yoboseyo? Saranghaeyo. Kamsahamnida!
Friend: Shhh!
Girl on street: (continues to mumble random Korean words)
Random foreigner: Girl, you in the wrong city. –K-Town Overheard by: EunMi

And It Goes With My Top

Man to friend: What's with the man bag?
Friend: It's not a man purse, it's a satchel! –NYU Medical Center Overheard by: Anthony