Teen boy: My puppy is probably going to die soon.
Teen girl: Aw, when?
Teen boy: Probably by next September, he’ll be a corpse.
Teen girl: Wait, why?
Teen boy: He has obsessive-compulsive disorder.
–Central Park
- Posted on
- Central Park, Death, Girls, Guys, Psychology, Stupidity, Teens, We Love Our Pets
Girl #1: Wow, your eyes look totally awesome. Is that from the pot?
Girl #2: Yeah, I think so.
Girl #1: It’s so cool. They look amazingly green.
–N train
Waiter: I assume you guys are on a date?
Guy #1: Yep.
Waiter: I just love seeing two nice young men together, so I brought you key lime shots to go with the key lime pie. Enjoy.
Guy #2: Bitch, you’ll do anything for alcohol.
–East of Eighth, W. 23rd Street
PR girl #1: I love your outfit today!
PR girl #2: You know, I was walking down the street, and this homeless man in a box told me that “Purple is the color of royalty.”
PR girl #1: Don’t joke about that. I could be joining him, if my apartment doesn’t come through.
PR girl #2: At least he lives in Manhattan.
–Office, 53rd & Broadway
Overheard by: Roger Resnicoff
- Posted on
- Fashion, Hobos, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Puerto Ricans, Real Estate
Dude #1: Turkey and swiss.
Deliman: Sorry, no cheese.
Dude #1: Jesus Christ! What kind of deli doesn’t have cheese?
Dude #2: Um, dude…Jewish deli…
Dude #1: I don’t suppose they’d have hot peppers either, then.
–2nd Avenue Deli
Overheard by: Adam Nathan
Girl: I was afraid the cab driver wasn’t going to take us to Brooklyn!
Guy: I know, he seemed annoyed when we said Brooklyn.
Girl: I mean, on Sex and the City they could never get a cab into Brooklyn.
–F train
- Posted on
- Girls, Guys, NYC Geography, On the Subway, Public Transportation, Stupidity, TV
Girl #1: He said he’s 5’7″.
Girl #2: Ugh, that’s too short.
Girl #1: No it isn’t. I mean, if you think about it, 5’7″, that’s almost like 6′.
–N train
Overheard by: Amanda
- Posted on
- Height, Idiots, On the Subway
Drunk guy #1: …and so she’s totally got clown makeup on from banging him the night before.
Drunk guy #2: Dude, rodeo clowns are tough shit.
–Fish Bar, E. 5th Street
Overheard by: Samantha
- Posted on
- Bars & Clubs, Drunks, Sex, Weirdness
Guy: Where the fuck is this bitch?…Oh, sorry ’bout the language ladies. I wasn’t talking about you, I was talking about my girlfriend.
–54th & 5th
Overheard by: E. Hart
- Posted on
- Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, All Wednesday One-Liners, Brooklyn, Dating, One-liners
Guy on cell: Yeah I know her, my sister went out with her when she was still a man.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Barry Divola
- Posted on
- All Wednesday One-Liners, Dating, Family Ties, On Cell, Washington Square Park
