Governor Pataki: Go out and study hard so you don’t get a bad exam on your grades.
–Cantor Film Center, East 8th Street
Overheard by: StyX
Man #1: The Tet Offensive was just confusing.
Man #2: Not really. I understood it completely.
Man #1: Well, let me use an analogy: it would be like if tomorrow, we went into Baghdad and removed all the troops. Is that how it was?
Man #2: Maybe; I don’t know what analogy means.
–Washington Place & 6th
Overheard by: Gradie Smith
Tween girl #1: So like apparently my brother is engaged.
Tween girl #2: Really? Since when?
Tween girl #1: I dunno, found out at breakfast this morning.
Tween girl #2: Didn’t he like just finish high school?
Tween girl #1: Yeah, but she’s like still 17 and she’s got a two year old so she’s way worse off than him.
Tween girl #2: Well is it his kid?
Tween girl #1: Who knows? He’s not tellin’.
Tween girl #2: Probably is…what a man-ho slut wedder.
–F train
Overheard by: Supertramp
Guy: So, go out with her! For her it will be a date. For you, it will be a charity event.
–Koi, W. 40th Street
Overheard by: Uptownish
Girl: Who’s playing tonight?
Guy: Coheed and Cambria.
Girl: Oh man, I shouldn’t have done all that acid.
–15th & Irving
Tourist man #1: We can probably find it at a Wal-Mart.
Tourist man #2: Yeah, Wal-Mart.
Tourist man #1: So let’s just keep walking until we find one. Keep your eyes open.
Tourist man #3: Well, in any case, we shouldn’t keep standing here on this corner looking at this map. We’ll get mugged.
–30th & 7th
Chick: If you don’t want to look like a lesbian at the party, make sure you stay a little drunk the whole time.
–57th & 5th
Overheard by: Annie
Dad: See there? When people tell you to go jump off the Brooklyn Bridge, that’s where you have to go.
–South Street Seaport
Overheard by: Jackie Randazzo
Hobo: Does anyone have a quarter so I can make a phone call?
Dude: You don’t need a quarter; just dial down the center, 1-800-CALL-ATT.
–23rd & Park
Overheard by: CoolyMadooly
Stripper chick: I don’t know, there was a detective that used to hang out with us in the club, maybe I could call him. He used to drive me home and shit.
Queer: Um, is he trustworthy?
Stripper chick: Well, actually he’s pretty shady, but whatever.
Queer: Actually, that’s probably better.
Stripper chick: You know, it probably is!
–A train
Guy #1: Man, you gotta do more drugs.
Guy #2: Well I was trying last night.
–19th & 5th
